Allans Allmighty Artichoke

Casting Time: 1 action Range: 1 mile Components: V, S, M (A solid gold artichoke heart worth at least 5,000 gp, which the spell consumes) Duration: Concentration, up to 10 minutes

Upon completion of the verbal component—a rhythmic, booming chant detailing the perfect recipe for a garlic vinaigrette—the sky takes on a shimmering, emerald-hued luster. A gargantuan, spectral artichoke, the size of a floating citadel, manifests five hundred feet above a point you can see.

The Descent of the Bracts. As the spell is cast, and at the start of each of your turns for the duration, you may cause one of the massive, serrated outer leaves (bracts) to detach and slam into the earth. Each bract is 40 feet wide and 60 feet long. Any creature in the impact zone must make a Dexterity saving throw, taking 12d10 bludgeoning damage on a failed save, or half as much on a success. The bracts remain on the field, providing total cover and turning the terrain into a labyrinthine nightmare.

The Pungent Peel. The air within a 300-foot radius of the impact site becomes saturated with the "Divine Aroma of Allan." This scent is so potent that it strips away the magical defenses of those who inhale it. Any creature within the area has its damage resistances and immunities suppressed. Furthermore, any creature attempting to cast a spell of 5th level or lower must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or lose the spell slot as they become momentarily distracted by an intense craving for a light snack.

The Heart of the Matter. As an action, you can cause the central "Heart" of the artichoke to pulse with golden light. Choose one of the following effects:

• The Succulent Surge: All allies within 100 feet of the spell’s center are healed for 100 hit points and are cured of any exhaustion.
• The Thorny Choke: The fuzzy center of the artichoke (the "choke") detaches and explodes into a cloud of razor-sharp fibers. Every creature within 120 feet of the center must make a Constitution saving throw, taking 20d6 piercing damage and becoming Blinded and Restrained for 1 minute on a failed save.

The Final Wilt. When the spell ends, the artichoke does not vanish. Instead, it undergoes a rapid, magical steaming process. The area is filled with a 60-foot-high cloud of boiling steam that deals 8d6 fire damage to any creature starting its turn there. When the steam clears, the battlefield is permanently littered with several tons of tender, edible, and surprisingly nutritious vegetable matter. Allan was many things, but he was never one to let a good harvest go to waste.